El Pupitre
Act 1 | Act 2 | Act 3 | Act 4 | Act 5
Black and White. Silent. Vlad rises from his bed and sits.
Narration (from Vlad): To the average person, the life of ninja may seem to be a life of spectacular events, a life of excitement, a life... of glory.
Vlad moves to the bathroom. Washes his face.
Narration: I, however, know the truth.
To color, sound of TV in background, Vlad walks out of the bathroom.
Vlad : (Groan, scratch nuts)What’s on?
Faheed : What?
Vlad : What’s on?
Faheed : How the hell would I know?
Vlad : Okay…
Faheed stares out of the window,
blankly.
Vlad : (confused, looking left and right)
What’re you doing man?
Faheed : I’m trying to achieve a zen-like
state, now if you would please leave me alone…
Vlad : Man… shut up, let’s get
something to eat.
Faheed : No, you shut up, fuck you man.
Vlad : Fuck me? No fuck you.
Faheed : What? You wanna start some shit?
Faheed pulls out a pistol and fires, the
bullet hits Vlad in the leg and he stumbles. Faheed goes up to him and puts the gun at point blank range,
shielding his own face with his hand.
Vlad : What’re you doing man?
Faheed fires, look of anguish on Faheeds
face. Faheed looks down.
Vlad is not there. Vlad suddenly appears behind Faheed with a sword raised up in
the air. Suddenly, Vlad awakes.
Vlad : (Heavily breathing) Holy shit…
Vlad lies back down in his bed, a
television suddenly turns on. Vlad
has a bewildered look on his face. Slowly,
Vlad gets up and brings a gun with him. He
slowly creeps out of his room and goes toward the couch.
He turns the corner, and sees Faheed looking out the window blankly.
Faheed turns and has a shocked look on his face.
Faheed : Yo, what the fuck you doin?
Vlad : Get on your knees and put your palms
flat on the table.
Faheed : Man, what the fuck is this?
Vlad : Shut up and do it.
Faheed : Man, I’m gonna kick your ass.
Faheed puts his hands on the table and
gets on the floor with his knees. Vlad
moves closer to Faheed. Suddenly
the door to the house opens. John
appears with a box of dough nuts in his hands.
John : Riiiiight…
What the fuck are you guys doing?
Vlad points the gun at John.
Faheed gets up and hits Vlad in the head with a slap jack.
Vlad blacks out. Vlad wakes
up, he is in his room, tied up. John
and Faheed are in the other room, talking
John : Yo, what the fuck was that all
about?
Faheed : I don’t know man, mother
fucker’s gone crazy since that Duche deal.
John : Oh. They fucked him up bad didn’t they?
Faheed : No fucking shit man, have you seen
how much weight he’s gained since the injuries, I’d doubt if he could still
do the moves.
John : Man, ninja is a state of mind, even
when his body is completely out of shape, he’ll still be able to use the
ancient art.
Cut back to shot of Vlad in chair.
Vlad (Narration) : Things got fucked up.
Fade out to new scene.
Faheed and Vlad are walking down a street.
They are dressed semi-formally.
Vlad : No fucking way man.
Its over, we can’t do this anymore.
Faheed : But this is our ticket.
We do this job, and we do it well… Needless to say, there’ll be a big
pay off.
Vlad : I know, but its such a fucked up job
man. How much are you really
willing to risk to get paid?
Faheed : I seriously need this money.
I still owe Finnerati half a million.
Vlad : Maaan, fuck.
Why the fuck did you need to get in that game anyway.
Faheed : I couldn’t help it, they were
challenging my manhood. No one
challenges my manhood without backing it up.
Vlad : Why did you have to associate me
with the debt man?
Faheed : They wouldn’t let me in without
a backup, I didn’t think it would get to that point.
Vlad : So we’re fucked if we don’t do
the job, we’re fucked if we do the job, but not well, and we’re in constant
danger the whole time.
Faheed : Pretty much, yeah.
Vlad : This is bullshit man.
Faheed : Hey man, don’t be playing all
innocent on me, you knew the risk when you agreed to back me up.
Vlad : I’m not blaming you man.
I’m just reflecting upon how shitty a situation this is.
Faheed : We might not have to do this all
by ourselves. I’ve got a homeboy
in the eastside. He might help us
out if we give him enough of cut.
Vlad : Let’s go.
Vlad and Faheed arrive at their car, and
enter. They drive away.
Fade out. Cut to shot of
John, sitting on lawn furniture with head back, and arms flailing loosely.
(He looks like he’s dead) He
suddenly grabs a gun from under his chair and fires.
Faheed(Narration) : This is crazy mother
fucker. I worked with him in Miami.
Vlad(Narration) : What makes his so crazy?
Faheed : He just seems a little unstable,
when you’re talking to him. You’ll
see what I mean.
Vlad : Why the hell do we want him?
Faheed : Well, he’s crazy enough to take
the job, and he’s good to have in a gun fight.
John enters a kitchen and drinks four
cups of water. Cut to shot of
closed bathroom door, water dripping sounds.
Vlad : Anything else really weird about
this guy?
Faheed : He drinks a lot.
Vlad : So… he’s gonna’ be wasted when we work with him?
Faheed : No, when I say drinks, I mean
anything, water, juice, soda, anything.
Vlad : You sure he’s not working on
another job or anything?
Faheed : Yeah, he was telling me how he’s
really bored.
John goes to a room, grabs a remote and
turns on the television. Someone
knocks on his door. John goes to a
monitor and sees Vlad and Faheed outside. Cut
to shot behind Vlad and Faheed. The
door opens.
John : Yo Heed, my man from Miami.
What you doin’ up here? And
who’s this Harry Potter looking mother fucker?
Cut to shot of Vlad with an odd look on
his face.
Faheed : (busts out laughing, but calms
down) This is Vlad, my partner from Baltimore.
John looks at Vlad with a suspicious
look.
John : How tall are you?
6’2” or so?
Vlad : Yeah, just about.
John : All right, I could kick your ass.
Come in.
Vlad looks at Faheed.
Faheed shrugs.
John : Have a seat.
Vlad and Faheed sit.
John : So how the fuck are you guys doing?
Faheed : Oh, its all cool man.
We been doin’ a little this and that.
Nothing big.
John stares blankly at the ceiling
above.
Vlad : Hey… uh, buddy, are you there?
John : Have you ever wondered how strong
ceilings are?
Vlad looks at Faheed.
Faheed looks back and shrugs his shoulders.
Faheed : That’s John…
John : Something’s gotta’ be goin’
on. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be
here at my home.
Faheed : All right, you got me.
There’s a big job going down.
John : How big?
Vlad : Almost six mil.
John : Six mil? Dollars?
Faheed : Yeah, big job.
John : (Very interested) What do we have to
do to get this six mil?
Cut to shot of John and Faheed talking,
with Vlad still tied up in other room.
John : Goddamnit man.
I should’ve never done the job in the first place.
Faheed : Hey man, I told you all the risks.
John : You didn’t tell me it was
Duche’s job. That’s the
important part.
Faheed : It wouldn’t have made a
difference.
John : What do you mean it wouldn’t have
made a difference? That’s the
reason why Vlad got fucked over, and why we still might be in trouble.
Faheed : Man that’s all fucking speculation. Why you always gotta' be speculating on on shit?
John : Cause speculation leads to the truth.
Faheed : Don't be giving me no fucking labels... truth, honesty, good, bad. None of that exists man, get it outa' your head.
John : What the fuck did you just say? Man... I don't even wanna' know. You fucked me over with this, period.
Faheed : I didn't fuck you over.
John : Yeah, okay.
John flinches, and begins shaking. He collapses to the ground.
Faheed : Uh... John?
John : What?
John picks himself up and dusts himself off, like nothing happened.
John : What're you looking at man.
Faheed : Did you just have a seizure?
John : I... don't think so. What makes you think that?
Loud crashes in the other room.
John and Faheed run to the door. They
open it, and Vlad is gone.
John : Oh my damn, how the fuck did he get
outa’ that.
Faheed : I don’t know, you tell me,
you’re the genius who perfected the fucking chair tying knot.
John : Hey man, that knot was flawless,
don’t blame the knot. It’s your
fucking fault for not gagging him enough.
Faheed : You don’t wanna’ choke the
mother fucker now.
John : Shit, where’s he off to now?
Cut to shot of Vlad stumbling up to a
house. Cut to shot of inside house.
Vlad sits in a dark room. Breathing
heavily, he takes a cup and has a drink.
Duche : (In the dark, light behind him
makes him indistinct) So Vlad, why
are you here? We already talked
about what we’re going do with the reduced shares.
Vlad looks very sick, he's taking deep breaths and holding his chest. He makes like he's going to vomit, but doesn't.
Vlad : I am still upset about that, but
that’s not what I’m here to talk to you about.
It’s the pills that you gave us beforehand. You assured me that there were no side effects.
Duche : There shouldn’t be.
Vlad : No fucking shit there shouldn’t
be. But there is.
Duche : How many did you take?
Vlad looks off blankly in the distance.
Duche : Vlad?
No response.
Duche : Vlad? Are you there?
Vlad : (Laughing) What?
Duche : How many pills did you take?
The expression on Vlad's face
changes. He becomes surprised. Cut to shot of Vlad droppings pills in
his hand(close up on hand). Cut to
shot of Vlad with hand over mouth and head tilted back.
Vlad : Uh… a handful.
Duche : A handful being?
Cut to freeze frame shot of Vlad with
pills in his hand.
Vlad : Oh… about six… seven?
Duche : Vlad… three at a time has been
known to cause brain damage. Four
has been known to kill people.
Vlad : Why the fuck didn’t you label that
shit?
Duche : It’s not like this is a fucking
pharmacy. We can’t exactly label
illegal performance enhancing drugs. What
could possibly have possessed you to pop that many pills in your mouth?
Cut to shot of Faheed talking to Vlad.
Faheed : Go ahead man, if there was a
problem with that, he would’ve told us.
Duche : And didn’t you feel a bit odd
after you took so many.
Cut to distorted shots of Vlad’s view.
Distored Faheed, distorted John, the camera shakes.
Vlad : What does it do to the brain?
Duche : On test subjects, those who took
too many would start having dillusions, very, very realistic dillusions.
Cut to shots of opening scene.
Vlad : Fuck…
Duche : Those who took it with a little
more than necessary had dillusions for up to three weeks.
After that, they appeared normal, except for all the damage they did to
their own bodies and those around them. I
told Faheed about all this.
Vlad stares blankly in the air.
He suddenly snaps into a violent rage and tackles Duche.
He takes out his gun and fires a shot.
Vlad : (Coming out of his daze)Oh
motherbitch.
Duche : You fuck, you shot me… (groans,
and lies his head down)
Vlad looks left and right, and quickly
runs away in one direction.
The sound of Faheed saying, “Faheed
: Go ahead man, if there was a problem with that, he would’ve told us.”
Cut to shot of John in car.
John : All right, so who's who, what's what?
Faheed : Here's the situation, from the beginning. There's dude Mohammed. (Cut to shot of Mohammed walking up to a house) He and this mobster guy, Duche, have been fighting over territory for drug running, and general thug crimes - to put it simply. When I say fighting, they really haven't been killing each other, I mean, nothing really happened to trigger that... until now. Duche just had a big ass score, with a couple million dollars in cash. Mohammed, through his various network of spies finds out about the transfer of this money. So, he decides to knock over the transport vehicle.
John : Was it a particularly big score?
Faheed : I don't think so. It was just his way of showing that he's ready to fight.
John : Okay, so we're more out to kill this Mohammed fellow than the money?
Faheed : Pretty much, yeah. Duche is pretty much gonna pay us with what we recover at Mohammed's hideout.
John : I see. So how does Duche know you guys?
Vlad : We've had prior business with him. He pays well.
John : What else have you done for him?
Vlad : I... don't wanna' talk about it. It was a bad time for me?
John : What?
Vlad : Drop it man, I don't even know you that well.
John : Ah c'mon, Faheed knows me.
Vlad : I don't give a fuck if my mother knows you, I don't.
John : You mother eh?
Vlad : Hey, asshole, what is your problem? Do I need to kick you ass?
John : Bring it on. I will fuuuu... (John stares out the window for a moment, then snaps back to attention, he looks left and right) What was I talking about again?
Vlad looks at Faheed.
Faheed : Look man, John's good for this job.
John : Ya damn right I am.
Vlad : Prove it, I wanna' see how fuckin' good you are.
John : What do you want me to do?
Vlad : Okay, you see that guy on the street? Go mug him.
John : You want me to just mug some random guy walking on the street?
Vlad : Yeah, why the hell not?
John : I'm not some common street thug man.
Vlad : So kill the mother fucker, I don't care, I just want proof that you're as harecore as Faheed says you are.
John : (Thinking for a moment) Man, stop the car.
John gets out and approaches the person on the street. The person speeds up and turns into an alley. John begins running.
John : Hey mother fucker, you owe me!
John turns the corner and stops, pulls out his gun and fires a shot into the runner. The person falls and John runs up to him.
Person : I don't know you man, I swear, I haven't done anything.
John : I know.
John aims his gun at the persons head. The person has a look of fright in his face. Suddenly, the person pees himself. John proceeds to take his wallet and run back to the car, waiting at the end of the alley. He throws the wet wallet at Vlad, it hits him in the face.
John : Ya' happy now mother fucker?
Faheed : Vlad, you brought it on yourself.
Fade out.
Faheed : Shit, Vlad’s a dangerous man
with that shit still in his system.
John : What exactly was that stuff anyway?
Faheed : It was a new performance enhancing
thing. Vlad felt that he was losing
his skill so he wanted something.
John : Is that why he passed out while chasing Mohammed?
Cut to shot of Vlad running, and
suddenly passing out.
Faheed : Possibly, but man, he was going
crazy on those guys.
Cut to shots of Vlad punching and
kicking at the camera. Cut to shot
of Vlad firing shots, squatting, and turning around corners.
John : We got everyone but Mohammed.
Faheed : Yeah, motherfucker just got up and
ran with the money.
John : Damn. (stomps floor in anger)
All this shit for fucking half a mil each.
Faheed : I don’t know man, Mohammed might
turn up.
John : Yeah, he’ll turn up with his whole
fucking gang trying to blow us away.
Faheed : We should be fine as long as we
lay low. And Vlad, as soon as he
snaps out of his drug shit should be able to track and kill Mohammed.
John : Man, how the fuck didn’t you get
him? I was on the other side of the
mansion, while you and Vlad were getting the front.
Faheed : (Yelling) I was busy upstairs!
John : So you should’ve had a birds
fucking eye view shouldn’t you?
Faheed : Okay, I’m gonna fucking snipe
people with a pistol while there’s mother fuckers shooting at me from 10 ft
away?
John : I told you I should’ve been
storming the front man.
Faheed : Whatever man, you didn’t get
shot or anything.
John : But still, all this fucking heat
over half a mil?
Faheed : I told you, we could still get
Mohammed.
John : How much did he get away with?
Faheed : Had to be somewhere near seven
million.
John : Why did Duche take such a small
share?
Faheed : He wanted those guys dead more
than the money. And he knew that he
had to pay the players a lot to take a job like this.
John : Was he going after Mohammed
specifically?
Faheed : Nah, he was okay with killing most
of that crew. I don’t know
exactly what his motives were.
John : Man, that mother fucker sure got a
head fucking start. He was outa’
there almost before even got started.
A cell phone rings.
John looks around and pulls it out of his pocket.
John : Oh, I still have your phone.
Faheed looks in shock.
John hands the phone over to Faheed, but looks down and looks in shock,
he suddenly pulls the phone away and grabs his gun.
Points it at Faheed.
John : What the fuck is this?
(holds face towards Faheed) How
does Mohammed have your number?
John answers the phone, still staring at
Faheed and pointing the gun.
John : Hello? (John listens for a moment)
Okay.
John hangs up the phone.
John : You had us all
fooled didn’t you?
Faheed : What’re you talking about?
John : You made a fucking deal with
Mohammed. You were gonna’ hoard
all the money yourself.
Faheed : But…
John : Shut up. I get what you get in this deal.
Why did Mohammed get from this.
Faheed : You think you have everything
figured out? You have shit figured
out.
John : Why don’t you explain before I
blow your fucking head off?
Faheed : Think about what you’re doing
first. You’re gonna’ have my
death and half a mil. That’s all.
If you don’t shoot me on the other hand…
I can cut you in.
John : What’s Mohammed’s part of this
deal?
Faheed : Mohammed stole the money from
Duche, but not alone. Him and his
20 person crew did the job. John,
divide 7 million into 21 parts, what does that give you?
John : I see. Why the fuck didn’t you tell us?
You were gonna screw us all over.
Faheed : Well what of it now?
If you let me live, you’ll get paid.
If you don’t, you get nothing.
John : I get the satisfaction of killing a
two faced mother fucker.
Suddenly a gun shot rings from outside.
Cut to shot of Vlad with a bloody leg limping towards the door.
John looks away for a moment. Faheed
draws his gun. John and Faheed
point guns at each other.
Faheed : Better not blink mother fucker.
John : Fuck you, if you wanna’ live you
better stop pointing that shit at me.
Faheed : That was Vlad’s gun, he’s
gonna be here a few moments. Either
way, you’re a dead mother fucker.
Cut to shot of Vlad stumbling to the
door. Cut to shot from inside
house. Vlad enters with an enraged
look in his eye. Vlad points the
gun at Faheed and fires. The bullet
his Faheed in the side.
Faheed : Ah… you mother fucker, what are
you doing? (grabbing side)
A gun shot rings from outside, Vlad
falls forward. Mohammed enters the
room.
Mohammed : Hiya mother fuckers.
What the shit are you idiots doing?
Faheed : Yo shoot this mother fucker, he
knows too much.
John : (breaking out into a laugh) By the
time this is all over, all of you mother fuckers are gonna be dead.
Mohammed : Yeah? How’s that?
John : I can dodge bullets.
Suddenly Vlad turns around (He was face
down) and fires a shot. Cut to
outside of house. Many shots are
fired. Shooting stops. Silence. Faheed
stumbles out of the house, grabbing his side, he is badly injured.
Suddenly a car drives by and someone fires a shotgun at Faheed.
Faheed flies backward in slow motion.
The car drives away. Cut to
shot of Duche in back of car with his arm in a sling.
Driver : Is it done sir?
Duche : Everyone that should be dead is
dead. I’d say that its done.
The
End